Magic Kingdom
A THREESOME remix for the writers' prompt: "Florida"
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So what we get drunk
So what we smoke weed
We're just having fun
We don't care who sees
So what we go out
That's how it's supposed to be
Living young and wild and free
-Young, Wild, and Free
Welcome to THREESOME: FLORIDA. I’m your host, Mark Smithivas. In this episode, our prompt is the great state of Florida, AKA Felon Central, AKA “Florida Man”. And who could be the better example of that than our new El Presidente, Donaldo Trumpo, resident of Mar-A-Lago?
What’s the first thing that come to mind? Disneyland of course. A couple years ago, I interviewed a young photographer who specialized in taking pictures of couples getting engaged or married there. That’s the source of the image above. It’s artificial happiness, writ large across the state, whether it’s sun, sand, margaritaville, or that IDGAF attitude from millions of tanned retirees moving here to race around in golfcarts and catch various STDs in some randy AARP enclaves. What better platitude to a happy future than Train’s “If It’s Love”?
That enthusiasm for living isn’t relegated to the senior citizens. You’ve got the young ‘uns like Matt Gaetz living “Young, Wild & Free”. It’s like Miami Vice all over again, except you’re a rapper living in a multi-million dollar mansion, or a financial mogul moving his company headquarters there to get away from the woke Midwest. Even multiple hurricanes striking your state can’t keep the young ‘uns from moving here and raving on its white sands while drinking new age kava kava medicinal cocktails.
To round out our threesome, we close with a rapper named after the state, Flo-rida, with the evergreen house party anthem, “My House”. Welcome to my house, music too loud…
Derek Jeter’s house, formerly rented by Tom Brady
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